Otherwise know as, My Job in Summary Form.
I make it a point not to blog about my job. I don't know why exactly. Perhaps because all interesting stories are simultaneously entertaining and complaining. The best stories are the most painful. So I avoid telling work stories all together. But today it cannot be helped.
I work in Event Management. I plan corporate parties. I am not a wedding planner. I do NOT work with brides. There are many good reasons for this. The main one being for the most part, every bride (that can afford a legitimate planner) is what we call a bridezilla. (if you are going to spend $100K plus on a wedding...it understandably must be perfect) Corporate money is much easier parted with. Hence, I work in corporate event planning.
But this safety measure is not entirely fool proof. Occasionally a corporate "bridezilla" slips in.
The following excerpt is the an unedited (with the exception of the removal of any specific reference to a specific thing or person, and a slight abridgment) real life email from a legitimate client. His was hugely entertaining (and revolting at the same time) to me. I hope that someone not in my line of work will also appreciate it. Otherwise, my apologies in advance.
Dear Meeting Planner- -
For our conference next fall, I suggest that you be sure that the FancyRestaurant's menu, as well as any other venue for "group" meals where beef is served, includes SpecificBrandName fine-ground, hot prepared horseradish. World famous!! Not one of those "wimpy" horseradish sauces, consisting of mostly sour cream, but REAL horseradish. SpecificBrandName has been a fine local company for roughly 75 years. I think they even generated fees for some lawyers over the years, with tax controversies, a charge of allegedly diluting their products decades ago with a bit of potatoes thrown in, whatever. But they DO make a good HOT horseradish for folks who really know how to spice up their beef.
I have no "interest" in the company, but I have a great interest in having our company provide hot horseradish with beef - - - not just a wimpy sauce. Maybe both - - the real stuff for beef lovers, and the mildly-spiked sauce for those who prefer that. Whatever!
Too bad I'm at my PoshSeasideTown place right now, or I'd call for a dinner reservation!! I just made myself hungry!
Sincerely, Uppity Lawyer Client.
He had other bits of wisdom long this line to share - which restaurants to eat at, which manager to ask for for the best service, etc etc. I will spare you the details and stick to the highlights.
Is he for real? Yes. Yes folks, he is. No "wimpy sauce" for him. Bring on the tax-evading-local-company horseradish; there is no substitue.
This is why they pay me the big money. To make sure my client's horseradish is too their liking.
One day I will retire. And it will be a beautiful thing.
I make it a point not to blog about my job. I don't know why exactly. Perhaps because all interesting stories are simultaneously entertaining and complaining. The best stories are the most painful. So I avoid telling work stories all together. But today it cannot be helped.
I work in Event Management. I plan corporate parties. I am not a wedding planner. I do NOT work with brides. There are many good reasons for this. The main one being for the most part, every bride (that can afford a legitimate planner) is what we call a bridezilla. (if you are going to spend $100K plus on a wedding...it understandably must be perfect) Corporate money is much easier parted with. Hence, I work in corporate event planning.
But this safety measure is not entirely fool proof. Occasionally a corporate "bridezilla" slips in.
The following excerpt is the an unedited (with the exception of the removal of any specific reference to a specific thing or person, and a slight abridgment) real life email from a legitimate client. His was hugely entertaining (and revolting at the same time) to me. I hope that someone not in my line of work will also appreciate it. Otherwise, my apologies in advance.
Dear Meeting Planner- -
For our conference next fall, I suggest that you be sure that the FancyRestaurant's menu, as well as any other venue for "group" meals where beef is served, includes SpecificBrandName fine-ground, hot prepared horseradish. World famous!! Not one of those "wimpy" horseradish sauces, consisting of mostly sour cream, but REAL horseradish. SpecificBrandName has been a fine local company for roughly 75 years. I think they even generated fees for some lawyers over the years, with tax controversies, a charge of allegedly diluting their products decades ago with a bit of potatoes thrown in, whatever. But they DO make a good HOT horseradish for folks who really know how to spice up their beef.
I have no "interest" in the company, but I have a great interest in having our company provide hot horseradish with beef - - - not just a wimpy sauce. Maybe both - - the real stuff for beef lovers, and the mildly-spiked sauce for those who prefer that. Whatever!
Too bad I'm at my PoshSeasideTown place right now, or I'd call for a dinner reservation!! I just made myself hungry!
Sincerely, Uppity Lawyer Client.
He had other bits of wisdom long this line to share - which restaurants to eat at, which manager to ask for for the best service, etc etc. I will spare you the details and stick to the highlights.
Is he for real? Yes. Yes folks, he is. No "wimpy sauce" for him. Bring on the tax-evading-local-company horseradish; there is no substitue.
This is why they pay me the big money. To make sure my client's horseradish is too their liking.
One day I will retire. And it will be a beautiful thing.
2 comments:
:-) too much!
Hahahahaha.... Poor Emily. I hope that you are able to find the right kind of sauce and retire in peace. With no horseradish sauces needed ever again!
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